5

    Tunnel Kids, Open Case

    2m Episode 52026-04-10
    Badge LaunderersComedy / Action / Mystery

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    Episode Script

    INT. ABANDONED STORM DRAIN - DAY
    Water DRIPS. Sunlight slices in through a grate like prison bars.
    COLE MERCER crouches over a soggy folder, trying to salvage papers with a hand dryer jury-rigged to a car battery. It SPUTTERS like it’s dying.
    JUNO REYES and two TEEN SCAVENGERS (off to the side) paint a cardboard sign: CITIZEN’S ARREST IN PROGRESS.
    JUNO
    You sure this is the hideout vibe? Because “damp raccoon divorce” is strong.
    COLE
    It’s quiet. It’s unseen. It’s—
    (the dryer sparks)
    —electrically questionable.
    JUNO
    Great. If the cops don’t find you, the city’s infrastructure will.
    Cole peels a page free. It’s a PRINTED TIP EMAIL, smeared but readable: “MERCER MEETS VALE. 2:15. DRAIN ACCESS 14-B.”
    COLE
    This tip got Holt here. It’s… too neat.
    JUNO
    Neat like your hair before you became a wanted man.
    COLE
    Neat like a plant.
    Juno’s eyes light up—mischief and strategy in the same flicker.
    JUNO
    Okay. If someone’s steering Holt… we yank the wheel.
    She points at the sign.
    JUNO (CONT'D)
    Operation: Tunnel Kids, Open Case.
    Cole clocks the sign.
    COLE
    No.
    JUNO
    Yes. We’re doing the thing where we weaponize your guilt into growth.
    COLE
    That’s not a thing.
    JUNO
    It is. I trademarked it on a napkin.
    A SHADOW crosses the grate above. FOOTSTEPS. A flashlight beam knifes down.
    JUNO (CONT'D)
    Positions.
    Cole hesitates—then pockets the damp tip.
    CUT TO:
    INT. STORM DRAIN - CONTINUOUS
    DETECTIVE DANA HOLT drops through a maintenance hatch with practiced control. Gun drawn, badge out. Her shoes splash.
    HOLT
    Cole Mercer. Hands where I can—
    A SHOPPING CART slams into view, pushed by a TEEN in a construction vest. The cart is stuffed with junk: pool noodles, traffic cones, a busted mannequin.
    The cart WOBBLES, tips—NOODLES smack Holt’s gun hand. The gun clatters into shallow water.
    HOLT (CONT'D)
    Are you kidding me?
    Juno steps out, wearing an oversized SECURITY JACKET and a plastic sheriff star stuck on with duct tape. She holds up a zip-tie like it’s a pair of handcuffs.
    JUNO
    Detective Dana Holt, you are under citizen’s arrest.
    Holt stares, deadpan.
    HOLT
    For what.
    JUNO
    For excessive tunnel intimidation. And… loitering with intent to persecute.
    COLE
    Juno—
    JUNO
    (shushes him)
    Let the justice system work, Cole.
    Holt’s gaze flicks past them, assessing: exits, numbers, the ridiculous cart, the mannequin.
    HOLT
    Move. Now.
    The other teens POP a traffic cone on Holt’s head from behind like a magic trick. It’s absurdly clean. Holt freezes—then slowly lifts the cone off.
    HOLT (CONT'D)
    You’re… a crew.
    JUNO
    We prefer “urban adventurers.”
    COLE
    Trespassers.
    JUNO
    Treasure consultants.
    Holt steps forward, controlled, calm—but her eyes narrow on the damp paper peeking from Cole’s pocket.
    HOLT
    That tip. The email.
    Cole stiffens.
    COLE
    You got it too.
    HOLT
    I got it through dispatch. Anonymous. Timestamped like it wanted a trophy.
    Juno leans in, theatrically whispering.
    JUNO
    So you came down here to collect him like a coupon.
    Holt ignores her. To Cole:
    HOLT
    Why would Maris Vale meet you in a storm drain.
    COLE
    She wouldn’t.
    Beat. Holt’s certainty falters. She hates that it does.
    HOLT
    Then why am I here.
    Juno points at Holt’s badge, like it’s a clue on a corkboard.
    JUNO
    Because someone’s using you. Like… evidence Febreze.
    COLE
    Evidence laundering.
    Holt’s jaw tightens. She glances at the water—Cole’s soaked folder—then back up.
    HOLT
    The planted tip I followed yesterday? It led to a house that didn’t exist.
    COLE
    So you know.
    HOLT
    I know something’s off.
    (beat)
    I don’t know who.
    Juno’s grin drops into sincerity for half a second.
    JUNO
    Then stop hunting him like he’s the problem. Hunt whoever’s writing your script.
    Holt looks at Cole. A long moment. Professional instinct versus a new, ugly pattern.
    HOLT
    I should cuff you.
    JUNO
    You can’t. I citizen-cuffed you first.
    Holt exhales—almost a laugh, quickly strangled.
    HOLT
    Fine.
    (to Cole)
    I didn’t see you.
    Cole blinks.
    COLE
    Holt—
    HOLT
    But listen to me, Mercer. Whoever’s steering this? They’ll steer harder now.
    Juno raises the zip-tie like a gavel.
    JUNO
    Court adjourned! Everyone scatter dramatically!
    The teens grab the cart, the mannequin, the sign. Chaos in practiced choreography. Cole hesitates one more beat—then backs away into the tunnel dark.
    Holt watches them go, alone in the beam of her own flashlight.
    She pulls out her phone, opens the tip email, and notices something.
    On the footer: a tiny emblem. A LAUNDRY TAG ICON.
    HOLT
    (under her breath)
    …You’ve gotta be kidding me.
    She pockets the phone, eyes sharpening—finally looking in the right direction.
    SMASH CUT TO BLACK.